View Poll Results: Vote for your favorite Nominee!

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  • The Winna!!!

    2 18.18%
  • Runner Up

    1 9.09%
  • Honorable Mention

    2 18.18%
  • 4th Place

    0 0%
  • 5th Place

    2 18.18%
  • 6th Place

    1 9.09%
  • 7th Place

    2 18.18%
  • 8th Place

    1 9.09%
Results 1 to 13 of 13

Yeah I know, who knows if these are true or not. Still makes a great ... Stackers' Lounge forum

  1. #1
    LaTuFu's Avatar
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    The 2007 Darwin Awards

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    Yeah I know, who knows if these are true or not. Still makes a great read if you're bored. Vote for your favorite!


    Eighth Place: In Detroit, a 41-year-old man got stuck and drowned in two
    feet of water after squeezing head first through an 18-inch-wide sewer
    grate while trying to retrieve his car keys.

    Seventh Place: A 49-year-old San Francisco stockbroker -- who often
    bragged he was "totally-zoned when he ran" -- accidentally jogged off a
    100-foot high cliff on his daily workout.

    Sixth Place: While at the beach, Daniel Jones, 21, dug an 8-foot hole
    for protection from the wind and had been sitting in a beach chair at
    the bottom when it collapsed, burying him beneath 5 feet of sand. People
    on the beach used their hands and shovels trying to get him out but
    could not reach him. It took rescue workers using heavy equipment almost
    an hour to free him. Jones was pronounced dead at a local hospital.

    Fifth Place: Santiago Alvarado, 24, was killed as he fell through the
    ceiling of a bicycle shop he was burglarizing. Death was caused when the
    long flashlight he had placed in his mouth to keep his hands free rammed
    into the base of his skull as he hit the floor.

    Fourth Place: Sylvester Briddell, Jr., 26, was killed as he won a bet
    with friends who said he would not put a revolver loaded with four
    cartridges into his mouth and pull the trigger.

    Third Place: After stepping around a marked police patrol car parked at
    the front door, a man walked into H & J Leather & Firearms intent on
    robbing the store. The shop was full of customers and a uniformed
    officer was standing at the counter. Upon seeing the officer, the
    would-be robber announced a hold-up, and fired a few wild shots from a
    target pistol. The officer and a clerk promptly returned fire, and
    several customers also drew their guns and fired. The robber was
    pronounced dead at the scene by paramedics. Crime scene investigators
    located 47 expended cartridge cases in the shop. The subsequent autopsy
    revealed 23 gunshot wounds. Ballistics identified rounds from seven
    different weapons. No one else was hurt.

    HONORABLE MENTION: Paul Stiller, 47, and his wife Bonnie were bored just
    driving around at 2 A.M. so they lit a quarter stick of dynamite to toss
    out the window to create some excitement. Apparently they failed to
    notice the window was closed.

    RUNNER UP: Kerry Bingham had been drinking with several friends when one
    of them said they knew a person who had bungee-jumped from a local
    bridge in the middle of traffic. The conversation grew more heated and
    at least 10 men trooped along the walkway of the bridge at 4:30 AM. Upon
    arrival at the midpoint of the bridge, they discovered that no one had
    brought a bungee rope. Bingham, who had continued drinking, volunteered
    and pointed out that a coil of lineman's cable lay nearby. They secured
    one end around Bingham's leg and tied the other to the bridge. His fall
    lasted 40 feet before the cable tightened and tore his foot off at the
    ankle. He miraculously survived his fall into the icy water and was
    rescued by two nearby fishermen. Bingham's foot was never located.

    AND THE 2007 WINNER IS...
    Zoo keeper, Friedrich Riesfeldt (Paderborn, Germany) fed his
    constipated elephant 22 doses of a animal laxative and more than a
    bushel of berries, figs and prunes, before the plugged-up pachyderm
    finally got relief.

    Investigators say ill-fated Friedrich, 46, was attempting to give the
    ailing elephant an olive oil enema when the beast suddenly unloaded. The
    sheer force of the elephant's unexpected defecation knocked Mr.
    Riesfeldt to the ground where he struck his head on a rock as the
    elephant continued to evacuate 200 pounds of dung on top of him. It
    seems to be just one of those freak accidents that once again
    proves..."**** happens!"
    If I knew where I was going, I might already be there. -- Cross Canadian Ragweed.

  2. #2
    LaTuFu's Avatar
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    Re: The 2007 Darwin Awards

    And of course, I leave out 3rd place in the poll, he was my choice!
    If I knew where I was going, I might already be there. -- Cross Canadian Ragweed.

  3. #3
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    Re: The 2007 Darwin Awards

    These are great. Honorable mention is my personal favorite.

  4. #4
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    Re: The 2007 Darwin Awards

    8th place.

    That would make for a great "fail" image.

    Like a real life version of this.. (click attachment)

    Too bad this thread didn't have pictures attached.
    Attached Images Attached Images

  5. #5
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    Re: The 2007 Darwin Awards

    you can always count on Fu for a feel good story to start the day. thanks pal.
    The above commentary is for entertainment purposes only. If this was actual joke the tone you just heard would have been followed by emergency response information. It's supposed to be fun people.

  6. #6
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    Re: The 2007 Darwin Awards

    My pleasure buddy. Any time.
    If I knew where I was going, I might already be there. -- Cross Canadian Ragweed.

  7. #7
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    Re: The 2007 Darwin Awards

    HONORABLE MENTION: Paul Stiller, 47, and his wife Bonnie were bored just
    driving around at 2 A.M. so they lit a quarter stick of dynamite to toss
    out the window to create some excitement. Apparently they failed to
    notice the window was closed.

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  8. #8
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    Re: The 2007 Darwin Awards

    Funny, but i'm betting it's mostly fake.

  9. #9
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    Re: The 2007 Darwin Awards

    Actually to win a Darwin Award there has to be proof in newspaper articles or something or witnesses. Otherwise it can't be nominated. Yep, people this stupid really do exist.

    Tucker

  10. #10
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    Re: The 2007 Darwin Awards

    Quote Originally Posted by jsmith42 View Post
    Funny, but i'm betting it's mostly fake.

    "Do not attribute to malice what is explainable by stupidity" (F. Garcia Lorca)

    ...here's to the gene pool


    PS Seventh Place. I can just imagine him falling off Russian Hill somewhere

  11. #11
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    Re: The 2007 Darwin Awards

    thats some pretty good stuff. i think we call this natural selection
    "T-Dub"
    T- Mo: BB 9700, 8900, 8220
    Sprint: BB 8330, 8830, 8130, 8703, 7250

    But there's a beautiful view of the end of the world from the pier.....

  12. #12
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    Re: The 2007 Darwin Awards

    Quote Originally Posted by jsmith42 View Post
    Funny, but i'm betting it's mostly fake.
    I'm skeptical, too, but then again, sometimes you can't make up stupidity.

    There are "Do Not Use In The Shower" labels on hairdryers because some dumbssa at one time or another thought it would be a unique time saver.
    If I knew where I was going, I might already be there. -- Cross Canadian Ragweed.

  13. #13
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    Re: The 2007 Darwin Awards

    There are "Do not install while car is moving" signs on carburator air filters

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