Page 4 of 6 FirstFirst 123456 LastLast
Results 46 to 60 of 83

Originally Posted by iron07 i want to go to this school SWEDISH teacher has been ... Stackers' Lounge forum

  1. #46
    cwax's Avatar
    cwax no está en línea BES Pro
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    PIN/ID
    32DEF7BB
    Posts
    4,513

    Re: "find some weird stuff and put in here" thread

    Advertisement



    Quote Originally Posted by iron07 View Post
    i want to go to this school


    SWEDISH teacher has been fined for flashing her breasts at a male pupil.





    http://www.metro.co.uk/weird/article...7&in_page_id=2
    Those are the Breast teaching practices I ever heard of BWAHAHAHA!!




  2. #47
    iron07's Avatar
    iron07 no está en línea Stack level 4
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    PIN/ID
    22bf2ae1
    Posts
    609

    Re: "find some weird stuff and put in here" thread

    i wanted to share this i thought it was funny


    Should make you smile




    This is hysterical
    Read the WHOLE thing. Pocket Taser Stun Gun, a great gift for the wife...


    A guy who purchased his lovely wife a pocket Taser for their anniversary
    submitted this. Last weekend I saw something at Larry's Pistol & Pawn Shop
    that sparked my interest. The occasion was
    our 15th anniversary and I was looking for a little something extra for my
    wife Julie. What I came across was a 100,000-volt, pocket/purse-sized taser.


    The effects of the taser were supposed to be short lived, with no long-term
    adverse affect on your assailant, allowing her adequate time to retreat to
    safety.


    WAY TOO COOL!
    Long story short, I bought the device and brought it home. I loaded two
    triple-a batteries in the darn thing and pushed the button. Nothing! I was
    disappointed. I learned, however, that if I pushed the button AND
    pressed it against a metal surface at the same time; I'd get the blue arch
    of electricity darting back and forth between the prongs.??
    AWESOME!!!? Unfortunately, I have yet to explain to Julie what
    that burn spot is on the face of her microwave!
    Okay, so I was home alone with this new toy, thinking to myself that it
    couldn't be all that bad with only two triple-A batteries, right?! !??
    There I sat in my recliner, my cat Gracie looking on intently (trusting
    little soul) while I was reading the directions and thinking that I really
    needed to try this thing out on a flesh & blood moving target.
    I must admit I thought about zapping Gracie (for a fraction of a second) and
    thought better of it. She is such a sweet cat. But, if I was going to give
    this thing to my wife to protect herself against a mugger, I did want some
    assurance that it would work as advertised. Am I wrong???
    So, there I sat in a pair of shorts and a tank top with my reading glasses
    perched delicately on the bridge of my nose, directions in one hand, and
    taser in another.
    The directions said that a one-second burst would shock and disorient your
    assailant; a two-second burst was supposed to cause muscle spasms and a
    major loss of bodily control; a three-second burst
    would purportedly make your assailant flop on the ground like a fish out of
    water. Any burst longer than three seconds would be wasting the batteries.?
    ? All the while I'm looking at this little device
    measuring about 5" long, less than 3/4 inch in circumference; pretty cute
    really and (loaded with two itsy, bitsy triple-A batteries) thinking to
    myself, "no possible way!"??
    What happened next is almost beyond description, but I'll do my best...
    I'm sitting there alone, Gracie looking on with her head cocked to one side
    as to say, "don't do it dumbass," reasoning that a one- second burst from
    such a tiny little ole thing couldn't hurt all that bad. I decided to give
    myself a one-second burst just for heck of it. I touched the prongs to my
    naked thigh, pushed the button and...
    HOLY MOTHER OF GOD, WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION!!!
    I'm pretty sure Hulk Hogan ran in through the side door, picked me up in the
    recliner, then body slammed us both on the carpet, over and over and over
    again. I vaguely recall waking up on my side in the fetal position, with
    tears in my eyes, body soaking wet, both nipples on fire, testicles nowhere
    to be found, with my left arm tucked under my body
    in the oddest position, and tingling in my legs! The cat was standing over
    me making meowing sounds I had never heard before, licking my face,
    undoubtedly thinking to herself, "Do it again, stupid, do it again!"
    Note: If you ever feel compelled to "mug" yourself with a taser, one note of
    caution: there is no such thing as a one-second burst when you zap
    yourself!You will not let go of that thing until it is dislodged from your
    hand by a violent thrashing about on the floor. A three-second burst would
    be considered conservative.
    SON-OF-A-*%#... That hurt like **% !!!
    A minute or so later (I can't be sure, as time was a relative thing at that
    point), I collected my wits (what little I had left), sat up and surveyed
    the landscape. My bent reading glasses were on the mantel of the fireplace.
    How did they get up there??? My triceps, right thigh and both nipples were
    still twitching. My face felt like it had been shot up with Novocain, and my
    bottom lip weighed 88 lbs. I'm still looking for my testicles! I'm offering
    a significant reward for their safe return!!
    P. S. My wife loved the gift, and now regularly threatens me with it!
    If you think Education is difficult, try being stupid

  3. #48
    BERRYCURVE's Avatar
    BERRYCURVE no está en línea Stack level 5
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Posts
    1,763

    Re: "find some weird stuff and put in here" thread



  4. #49
    Specs's Avatar
    Specs no está en línea Stack level 5
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Posts
    1,500

    Re: "find some weird stuff and put in here" thread

    To be posted VERY LOW on the refrigerator door - about snout height.

    Dear Dogs and Cats,

    The dishes with the paw prints are yours and contain your food.
    The other dishes are mine and contain my food. Please note, placing a paw print in the middle of my plate of food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.

    The stairway was not designed by Formula 1 and is not a racetrack. Beating me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn’t help because I fall faster than you will ever run.

    I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out the other end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm and takes the piss.

    For the last time, there is not a secret exit from the bathroom. If by some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, whinge or try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge and try to pull the door open. I must exit through the same door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for years — canine or feline attendance / supervision is not mandatory.

    The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cats butt. I cannot stress this enough!

    To pacify you, my dear pets, I have posted the following message on our front door:

    To All Non-Pet Owners Who Visit & Like to Complain About Our Pets

    1. They live here. You don’t!
    2. If you don’t want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture.
    (That’s why they call it “fur”niture.)
    3. I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.
    4. To you, it’s an animal. To me, he/she is an adopted son/daughter who is short, hairy, walks on all fours and doesn’t speak clearly.
    5. Don’t threaten me on my own doorstep. I have a dog. It has teeth. You might not be able to wipe your arse again properly.

    Remember: Dogs and cats are better than kids because they:

    1. Eat less.
    2. Don’t ask for money all the time.
    3. Are easier to train.
    4. Usually come when called.
    5. Never drive your car.
    6. Never lie or talk back to you.
    7. Don’t hang out with drug-using friends.
    8. Don’t smoke or drink.
    9. Don’t worry about having to buy the latest fashions.
    10. Don’t wear your clothes.
    11. Don’t need a gazillion pounds for college, and…
    12. If they get pregnant, you can sell their children.

  5. #50
    BERRYCURVE's Avatar
    BERRYCURVE no está en línea Stack level 5
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Posts
    1,763

    Re: "find some weird stuff and put in here" thread



  6. #51
    clarkkent51ny's Avatar
    clarkkent51ny no está en línea Themes Pro
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    PIN/ID
    305DA705
    Posts
    4,982

    Re: "find some weird stuff and put in here" thread

    This is my Blackberry. There are many like it, but this one is mine. Without me my Blackberry is useless. Without my Blackberry I am useless.

    BDG51@vzw.blackberry.net
    http://briandominic.vox.com/

  7. #52
    monica.simons's Avatar
    monica.simons no está en línea Stack level 6
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    PIN/ID
    ASKME
    Posts
    2,396

    Re: "find some weird stuff and put in here" thread

    LMAO..that must be the dog that jlama's pearl ate
    Providing customers with the latest in news and info along with experienced one on one tech support, training, product sales, exclusive themes and more.

  8. #53
    goobah's Avatar
    goobah no está en línea Stack level 3
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Posts
    172

    Re: "find some weird stuff and put in here" thread


  9. #54
    wassona's Avatar
    wassona no está en línea Stack level 3
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    PIN/ID
    2439fbe3
    Posts
    270

    Re: "find some weird stuff and put in here" thread

    Quote Originally Posted by goobah View Post
    OMG!!

    What?, Where?, When?, How?

  10. #55
    sadie84's Avatar
    sadie84 no está en línea Stack level 7
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    PIN/ID
    ask
    Posts
    4,972

    Re: "find some weird stuff and put in here" thread

    Like the angel you are you laugh creating a lightness in my chest,
    Your eyes they penetrate me,
    (Your answer's always 'maybe')
    That's when I got up and left.

  11. #56
    LaTuFu's Avatar
    LaTuFu no está en línea Stack level 9
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    PIN/ID
    Just Ax
    Posts
    7,861

    Re: "find some weird stuff and put in here" thread

    If I knew where I was going, I might already be there. -- Cross Canadian Ragweed.

  12. #57
    BERRYCURVE's Avatar
    BERRYCURVE no está en línea Stack level 5
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Posts
    1,763

    Re: "find some weird stuff and put in here" thread



  13. #58
    monica.simons's Avatar
    monica.simons no está en línea Stack level 6
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    PIN/ID
    ASKME
    Posts
    2,396

    Re: "find some weird stuff and put in here" thread

    oh thats gross..
    Providing customers with the latest in news and info along with experienced one on one tech support, training, product sales, exclusive themes and more.

  14. #59
    cwax's Avatar
    cwax no está en línea BES Pro
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    PIN/ID
    32DEF7BB
    Posts
    4,513

    Re: "find some weird stuff and put in here" thread





  15. #60
    Specs's Avatar
    Specs no está en línea Stack level 5
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Posts
    1,500

    Re: "find some weird stuff and put in here" thread


Page 4 of 6 FirstFirst 123456 LastLast

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •