-Both you and your friend, delete each other off your bb messenger list
-Once the two of you are deleted, either you OR your friend add the other
-The added person should receive a add request, if not they can open the menu on the person's name and choose accept or whatever the ok to accept is
-Most of all, both have to have BB's for this to work(lol)
It sometimes takes a little while to refresh and be on the contacts list instead of the pending. Let me know what happens.